‘Research on the Internet led me to make a call to the New Zealand Herpes Foundation (NZHF) and, for the first time in a nightmare week, I felt there was light at the end of the tunnel.’

Margaret’s* experience with the NZHF gave her the information and support she needed to cope with her diagnosis. Here, she shares her recent experience.

I was in a situation that I could never have imagined myself to be in. It defies description.

I am 65, my husband of nearly 6 years is 60.

I was diagnosed with genital herpes very recently. It started when I had a problem passing urine. I thought I had a urinary tract infection. It got rapidly worse. The genital area became so swollen I could barely urinate. The pain was excruciating.

I was lucky. I was able to get an appointment with my doctor quite quickly. He examined me and gave me his diagnosis. He took swabs to be sent away to confirm the diagnosis. He prescribed acyiclovir and I also took paracetamol.

But the diagnosis and treatment was only part of it. I came home feeling totally shattered. Who could I turn to? Who could I talk to? Who could I confide in? I thought of members of my family. I couldn’t. I thought of close co-workers. I couldn’t. Which really close friend could I possibly unburden myself to? There was absolutely no-one I could share this with.

I thought I would try the internet and see what I could learn about Herpes. And so I typed the "word".

There was lots of information. I found a contact number close to home that I could ring for further information. It still took some courage to ring it. Making that call made it something real that I had to deal with. I rehearsed what I would say before I picked up the phone.

I could put it off no longer. I rang. And this very human voice, started talking to me. So understanding, empathetic, giving answers to my queries, allaying my fears, giving me confidence in myself.

I learned how common herpes is and that it didn’t mean my husband had been unfaithful. In fact I learned that my husband’s oral cold sores were the likely cause of my infection.

A week ago I didn’t know I would need such information. Now, for the first time in a week, I was able to sleep easier because of the information and reassurance that I was able to access.

*Margaret’s name has been changed, to protect her privacy.